my fake food blog

And now, for a MyFakeFoodBlog classic: Point/Counterpoint.

Point: I love the Internet.

It brings me so much joy. Because my life would’ve been incomplete without Thug Life Jeremy Renner.

Counterpoint: I hate the Internet.

I hate seeing the weird links that distant Facebook friends like. Or friends of friends. Some of them are weird. The links and the people. (Thanks, Madeline.)

The best/worst part of the Internet is its immediacy. It’s amazing to know what’s happening right this second around the world, particularly when it has to do with pandas/cats/baby pandas/baby cats. That’s my kind of international news.

Early this week, the Internet blew up because of some changes to Cadbury Creme Eggs. Basically, the price of cacao is going up so Cadbury has changed their chocolate recipe and is also including one less egg in their 6-pack. (That’s a 5-pack now people.) But, the price remains the same. It’s because I took two college level Econ classes that I explained that to you. (Note: I took the same class twice. I did not pass the first time.)

via MarketingMagazine

I first saw this on Grubstreet. And then my BFF Laura wrote an impassioned post on Facebook about it. Then I saw articles on Huff Po, CNN, The Guardian. Those last two are actual news sources. That cover actual news stories.

First of all, this only applies to the UK. So, all Americans who care, please unclench.

Also, and here’s my rull question.

Who.

Actually.

Really.

Truly.

Cares.

SERIOUSLY.

Besides Laura (who I love more than air) (seriously, she introduced me to my other BFF, Borthany Norvak) (who will forgive me for speaking my opinion) who actually cares.

Bethany & Borthany

Seriously. Who cares.

Cadbury Creme Eggs are the same as Peeps to me. Something you eat once a year and go “oh, yeah, I remember why I don’t eat these all year: because these are gross.”

Seriously. I am all for some novelty candy.

But let’s seriously take stock of this.

Candy corns?

via Wikipedia

Kinda gross. That dude you’re ashamed you made out with.

Mellowcreme pumpkin candy?

via thecandylandstore

The hotter version of candy corns. So, hot and gross. That dude you were initially proud you made out with (Good pull!) but then you he gave you a cold sore.

Marshmallow Peeps?

via sodahead

That dude you think you should make out with, so you try it every year, and every year you go, “NOPE. WHY DIDN’T I REMEMBER THIS FROM LAST YEAR.”

Candy Hearts?

via thesinglepartyofone

That dude who tries to make out with you and you immediately have to make out with someone else to cleanse your palette.

Jellybeans?

via Candywarehouse. Obviously.

via Wikipedia

A set of twins. One is hot (Jelly Belly) and one is not (Brach’s). You make out with the hot one sober and the ugly one drunk.

Brach’s Christmas Tree Nougat?

via CandyWarehouse (obviously again)

A really good looking guy who doesn’t know he’s good looking. You made out with him once, but you don’t know his name and you can’t find him again. (Obviously I love this candy. I have unrequited love for this candy.)

How does this relate to Cadbury Creme Eggs? Only tangentially. Which goes back to my original point:

I love the internet.